Lately, I haven’t felt like going to work. I love my job, so this surprises me, but most mornings I just feel like hanging out at home, puttering around the apartment, getting a little writing in, maybe reading a book; basically just curling up and hibernating. Maybe it’s the weather, rainy and cloudy, or maybe it is just that I haven’t had a day like that in awhile. Sure, sure, I know it was just the weekend yesterday, but the weekend is very different than a day at home during the week.
So this morning I was grumbling a little bit about having to go to work for the grueling five hours (life is so hard) and how I wished that I could just call in sick. I was day dreaming a little about how great it would be to be retired like my aunt or to win the lottery. I thought about planning an ideal future day, maybe trying to turn one of those weekend days into a personal day, when I realized that even if I can’t have my “perfect” day today (because I have to go to work), I can at least have my perfect morning.
I don’t work until 12:30 today, which means there is plenty of time to live exactly the way that I want to in the meantime. And the truth is, I can live my life exactly as I want to right now… with the exception of those five hours when I “have” to be at work (even though I know I’ll enjoy it once I get there). That is nineteen hours today that I can do what I please (though I will spend eight of them sleeping), so I don’t really have much room to complain about not getting my “perfect” day. It’s mine for the taking!
So that’s what I’ve done so far this morning. After getting back from selling plasma and making this realization, I’ve made a cup of tea and sat in bed writing. I’ve tried to avoid the temptation of the internet and the inbox, with mostly success. I’ve got a couple of books sitting on my nightstand to pick up, should writing begin to bore me. And for the most part, I feel quite content (it is hard to feel discontented sitting in bed with a cup of tea and a computer). I’m warm, I’m comfortable, and most importantly, I’m doing my work.
Austin Kleon wrote (or quoted someone else) to say that a writer (or other creative person) should do their creative work first thing in the morning so that no one (no job, no boss) can take it from you. It is good advice, and I’ve believed it before. But the only person who was trying to take my work from me today was me. I had to realize that just because I couldn’t have the whole twenty-four hours to myself is no reason to waste the hours I have. So if nothing else happens today, if work sucks (it won’t), at least I had my writing day.